Actress Chynna Phillips began the new year by opening up about how her faith in Jesus Christ has enabled her to let go of “anger, resentment and bitterness,” in her life and marriage to actor Billy Baldwin.
“I never thought I would become this person that would be holding onto anger, resentment, bitterness. But I have to tell you that I did become that person. And I am not proud to admit that. But it’s true,” Phillips, 55, told YouTube followers on Jan 6.
“I made a commitment to God that I was going to radically surrender to Him and that I was going to give Him all of my anger and bitterness … and resentment. And that I wasn’t going to make it an idol anymore and that I was going to leave it in the tomb.”
Phillips described her marriage as a “primary relationship,” and said it hasn’t been an easy journey for them. However, in 2024, she is praying for a common interest that will draw her and her husband closer.
“It’s a primary relationship and when that relationship starts to feel ruptured or damaged, or it starts to feel a little uneasy, that can be terrifying. I’ve been with Billy for 32 years. But we definitely had the hardest couple years of our lives,” Phillips admitted.
“These past couple of years have been a real struggle. And I think it’s because … I just took the deep dive into Jesus, and I think that he didn’t quite know what to do with that because it was kind of all Jesus, all the time.”
While addressing her struggles in her marriage in recent years, Phillips shared with her fans the importance of not “carrying around the burden of everything,” but to instead “leave their issues in the tomb.”
Baldwin and Phillips were married in 1995 and share three children together. In 2010, the couple separated and Phillips filed for divorce but withdrew the papers days later and reconciled with her husband.
Phillips said she and Baldwin “separated for six months” but did not specify when that split occurred. “When Billy and I separated for six months and he was out of the house, I was holding on to anger and resentment because I felt it made me justified. It made me feel like I was right, he was wrong, and it gave me this justification, this feeling of righteousness, this pride.”
“And so, I want to just have a conversation with you guys today about some of the things that maybe you are willing to talk to God about and those things that you’re willing to actually leave in the tomb,” Phillips said.
“Because you can’t carry around the burden of everything. … We’re not going to be able to surrender anything to Jesus until we let God be God. Because God does His job and He doesn’t need our help with that. He’s got it. He’s fine. He’s got this covered. He’s God,” she added.
“I just want us to stop and say, ‘OK God, You’re God. You’re going to do this. I am going to stop. I’m going to be still and I’m going to remember that you are God and that you are sovereign and that you are going to hear my prayer. And therefore, I give you this gigantic, painful, overwhelming, terrible burden … that I’ve been carrying around for too long.”
As she continued, Phillips opened up about another struggle she has been wrestling with: depression.
“I am feeling a numbness in my life. That is scary. It’s frightening, you know, because I know it’s obviously depression. And I know that it’s obviously the enemy attacking me. And I know that it’s just this feeling of like being beaten down,” Phillips detailed.
“I really do think that there’s like a hopelessness that I’ve been experiencing. But at the same time, I just recently have been feeling like I’m emerging out of that place in my life. And I’m grateful to God that I had the willingness to share with you guys … that I have been suffering, you know, really psychologically, mental illness. It’s just been a struggle for me.”
As the video continued, Phillips shared a prayer with viewers.
“Father God, tonight is a night to worship you and praise you and love you and adore you. Tonight is the night to know that you truly are real and that you do exist and that you are the beginning and the end, the Alpha and the Omega,” Phillips prayed.
“Father God, that you knit me together in my mother’s womb that you put the beating heart inside every single person who was with me tonight. … I thank You, Father God, that you are going to help us surrender. Rather we surrender, whatever it is that we’re holding on to that we have been like a dog with a bone unwilling to let go and let God,” she continued.
“Father, I ask you to guide us tonight and to give us the courage and the willingness to trust in your eternal work. … So Father, we are praying as if it has already been accomplished in your Name.”
Nicole Alcindor is a reporter for The Christian Post.
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